With so many changes happening, both personally and globally, I have had my emotions pushed and pulled and twisted around until I find myself unsure about how I feel. Am I the only one? My instinct tells me I am not.
All of us have been experiencing change like we have never experienced before. I am experiencing great changes in how I live and work and love and play. And sometimes it is exhausting and feels like loss after loss.
But there is a shift that has happened, at least it is a shift I am experiencing, that I want to share with the intention that you will know you are not alone. And I share it in the hope that you will hold on to hope if you have lost some over the course of this pandemic.
For many, many weeks, change felt like loss. My family and friends patiently listened to me cry and grieve the losses in my life, all while they were experiencing their own losses and changes. Personally, there were many changes:
- I moved out of my family home, the place I lived the longest in my life. It was the place I felt most safe and secure.
- I went through a painful separation.
- I didn’t get to see my kids every day or tuck them into bed every night.
- I began working from home, away from the students and the staff I love and love serving.
Globally, we all experienced massive changes. We changed how we worked. Many lost their source of income and the meaningful work that gave them a feeling of purpose. We stopped socially gathering and began learning to connect very differently. Facetime and Wine is a real thing. We have given up the ceremonies and celebrations that mark graduations and birthdays. Weddings are now held on Zoom and staff meetings and doctor’s appointments are held virtually.
And we could see all these changes as loss. Because they are a loss. But after grieving the loss, what is next?
Something has shifted for me this week. Something is telling me that all these changes, both the personal changes and the global changes, are less about loss and more about possibility.
So this is my new task – to ask what is the possibility in the loss. I think it is really important, however, to acknowledge and honour that we have lost. We can not move to seeing the possibilities until we grieve our loss. I share this not to shame anyone, not to tell you that your feeling of loss is not real or that you need to get over it. I am still not over it. But I share this to bring hope that on the other side of the loss is the possibility. And I share it so you know you are not alone. You are. Not. Alone.
There are so many things I am learning through this pandemic. When it is over, I hope the possibilities are not lost. I hope I will continue to ask myself how I can rather than why I can’t. I hope I continue to find adventure, to seek connection and to look for joy in unexpected places.
Friends, today know you are not alone. Stay safe. Stay home if you can. Reach out. Be well.